In his poem 性格は直らない he writes

「私は大変気が小さくて神経質なんですが、座禅を長くやっていれば、そういう性格が直るものでしょうか？」
昔よく師匠の武井哲応老師に、私はこんな質問をしました。
すると老師は
「直らない」
と、ずばり結論をいって・・・

One day I asked my teacher, “I know I’m somewhat cowardly and timid, But if I meditate continuously over a long period of time, do you think I can overcome it?”

“No I don’t think so,” he answered flatly. (Translation by Tim Jensen)

And again he writes:

この我執
そしてこの気の弱さ
共に必要あって
佛さまが
わたしに授けて
くれたもの

This cowardice and timidity
Were bestowed upon me by Buddha
With good reason (Translation by Tim Jensen)

So although, it’s true that “you grow into you” is unclear, the original 「自分が自分になる」is also unclear. It forces you to think about it. What on earth does that mean? What does 自分 or “self” mean? What is my real, true “self”? There aren’t any simple or clear answers to that I’m afraid. We each have to work it out for ourselves. Masaya has some nice ideas about it in my next post however…

Anyway, thanks for your comment. Though I disagree with “what you want to be”, thinking about why I disagree with it, actually helped me to understand the poem a little better.

That suffering
and sadness too
is all rich fertilizer
to help you grow
into you.

The last line sounds unclear to me.
So, how about

change “into you” to “as what you want to be.”?

I’ve finished now. Hurray! But oh dear, it’s 1:00 a.m.